Four Life-Changing Questions

We all have days where we’re in a bad mood and just can’t shake the frustration, anxiety, or disappointment and yet we don’t know what’s causing it. These four questions can help you take control of your emotions, re-focus on the task ahead and take charge of your day.

1. How do I feel?

It’s so important to acknowledge one’s feelings. Even if you don’t know exactly how you’re feeling and acknowledging that you do in fact have feelings that differ from your norm is a very important first step to taking charge of your emotions. Take a minute to close your eyes and try to name your feeling. It may even help to jot it down or talk through it with a friend.

2. When did I start to feel this way?

Everyone has triggers, but not everyone knows what their triggers are. this is how you identify your triggers and stop them from derailing your day. Think back to when your emotion changed. Were you speaking with someone? Watching or reading something? Did you lose or miss out on a sale or deal? When did the shift occur?

3. Why do I feel this way?

When the event occurred why did it elicit the response from you that it did? Are you feeling like you need to protect your heart? Defend your position? If so, why?

4. How do I feel?

Now that you know when and why you feel the way you do. You can express that emotion to yourself or others as necessary. Try this framework, I feel… when…. because….

Now that you’ve properly identified your emotions you can choose whether to hold on to the feeling associated with the experience or let it go. We can’t always control how we initially feel but I believe we can control whether or not we give those feelings control over the rest of our day, year, or life.

Click here to take the Emotional Intelligence Masterclass at a discounted rate. 

LeeAnah James is not a licensed therapist. This technique is not intended to cure or remedy any mental health issues. 

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